Poetry Project: Peace & War
Peace
Colorful flowers
Blowing in the summer breeze
Peaceful and golden.
A blue sky, no clouds
Endless waves crashing about
A serene landscape.
Laughter all around
Surrounded by happiness
Peace intersecting.
War
The sound of gunfire
Clouds of smoke fill the sky
A soldier sits still.
Blood and tears fall
Shouts and screams of fear echo
Nothing moves, time stops.
Fighting for your home
Peace is like a far off dream
Tensions rise higher.
Poetry Project Reflection
I think that while I was writing drafts for my haiku's my perspective changed quite a bit. While I knew that I wanted the topic to be on Peace, I wasn't sure how to get the message across. Because of this writing them took longer than expected because I wanted to get as descriptive as possible with my writing. When I first started out writing the haiku's sounded very unprofessional and there were a lot of random words thrown in there to fill up space. I had actually left a lot of those random words lying around in my first draft because I could not come up with something to replace them with. As time went by I started thinking about what I could replace the other words with and make it sound more flowing and professional while creating images in the readers mind. I think that eventually they started to sound really good. I decided that I wanted to add even more to it, so after I had finished the haiku's about Peace, I went on to create a series of similar sounding haiku's that were about War to match up with the ones about peace. It was pointed out to me later on that some of the haiku's from Peace and War were similar and matched up really well. After hearing that I thought about trying and recreating the rest of the haiku's so that they did that as well. I was not able to make them all do that but was able to recreate some of them to do that. Overall I think that it was rather successful and I like the way that my haiku's came out.
While writing the haiku's, there were several changes that I made to them so that they would be better. Out of all the changes that I made, there were three major changes that I had done.
The first major change that I made to my series of haiku's was going through and changing the wording so that they sounded more flowing and created better images. This was a really big change for me because before I had done it, the wording was all over the place and actually sounded kind of sloppy while reading through it. I had gone through and changed a lot of the words so that it sounded more, well, majestic, reading through it.
Example:
“A blue sky, no clouds
Endless waves crashing about
A serene landscape.”
After making this change I think that it sounds a lot better and through the use of descriptive wording creates really picturesque images for the reader. The reason that I made this change is mainly because I wanted to be as descriptive as possible while sticking with writing haiku's so that they could better relay that they were about Peace and War. It was not very easy coming up with more descriptive words and not using the same ones twice in the same haiku. A lot of the time while I was beginning to write these I was using really meek words that you'd throw into any other sentence, but I thought that didn't sound good so I went through and changed them to more flowing and better sounding words. Through doing this I felt I had finally made them out to what I had intended for them to be in the first place.
After I had made the first change to my haiku's I had thought that I needed to add more to them. After thinking about what I could add for a little while I thought that I would add more topics of what they could describe. After thinking, I decided that I wanted to add Truth and Power Haiku's to the list. I had only just finished writing out the haiku's about Power when it occurred to me that it sounded kind of repetitive to War. After realizing this I thought that it didn't sound very good so I dropped the idea of adding more tho them and got rid of the Power section. After they had been removed the original series of haiku's went together much better than when I wanted to add more and had more haiku's about Power. Once I had removed the Power haiku's, the poems went together much more smoothly and there was not some random series sitting in the middle of the two originals. I think that without the extra haiku's in there it sounds a lot better and helps the message of the original two series be a lot more clear, as well as make them have a much better feeling to them. Overall, after I had made this change, I think that the Peace and War haiku's turned out to be just fine.
Finally, the last major change that I had made to my series of haiku's was deciding that I wanted to create an art piece to match up with my haiku's. After a while of messing around with painting and such, I decided to do a digital art piece that matched up with the theme of Peace and War. I had created several rough copies of the paintings before creating the final one, with all my ideas poured into one. After creating the final art piece for each theme I think that it really helped relay what my haiku's were about so much more than just reciting them to a crowd. To go along with the art pieces I had recorded myself reciting my haiku's in a somewhat dramatic manner. It had taken several tries to get it so that it sounded good, as well as having to move from building to building to find a quiet spot for recording. After my voice was recorded I had added peaceful music to go along with the theme of Peace, and I had also added more dramatic and fast paced music to go along with war. After adding these things to the way that I was going to present my haiku's, I think that it really helped create a certain mood for each theme and the pictures got the imagination flowing in a sense of helping the listener imagine what was going on the scene described through the haiku's.
After making these changes to my series of haiku's I think that they turned out a lot better than what I had originally intended for them. I really liked the way that they came out after refining them and I think that they sound a lot better than what I had before I made changes.
Colorful flowers
Blowing in the summer breeze
Peaceful and golden.
A blue sky, no clouds
Endless waves crashing about
A serene landscape.
Laughter all around
Surrounded by happiness
Peace intersecting.
War
The sound of gunfire
Clouds of smoke fill the sky
A soldier sits still.
Blood and tears fall
Shouts and screams of fear echo
Nothing moves, time stops.
Fighting for your home
Peace is like a far off dream
Tensions rise higher.
Poetry Project Reflection
I think that while I was writing drafts for my haiku's my perspective changed quite a bit. While I knew that I wanted the topic to be on Peace, I wasn't sure how to get the message across. Because of this writing them took longer than expected because I wanted to get as descriptive as possible with my writing. When I first started out writing the haiku's sounded very unprofessional and there were a lot of random words thrown in there to fill up space. I had actually left a lot of those random words lying around in my first draft because I could not come up with something to replace them with. As time went by I started thinking about what I could replace the other words with and make it sound more flowing and professional while creating images in the readers mind. I think that eventually they started to sound really good. I decided that I wanted to add even more to it, so after I had finished the haiku's about Peace, I went on to create a series of similar sounding haiku's that were about War to match up with the ones about peace. It was pointed out to me later on that some of the haiku's from Peace and War were similar and matched up really well. After hearing that I thought about trying and recreating the rest of the haiku's so that they did that as well. I was not able to make them all do that but was able to recreate some of them to do that. Overall I think that it was rather successful and I like the way that my haiku's came out.
While writing the haiku's, there were several changes that I made to them so that they would be better. Out of all the changes that I made, there were three major changes that I had done.
The first major change that I made to my series of haiku's was going through and changing the wording so that they sounded more flowing and created better images. This was a really big change for me because before I had done it, the wording was all over the place and actually sounded kind of sloppy while reading through it. I had gone through and changed a lot of the words so that it sounded more, well, majestic, reading through it.
Example:
“A blue sky, no clouds
Endless waves crashing about
A serene landscape.”
After making this change I think that it sounds a lot better and through the use of descriptive wording creates really picturesque images for the reader. The reason that I made this change is mainly because I wanted to be as descriptive as possible while sticking with writing haiku's so that they could better relay that they were about Peace and War. It was not very easy coming up with more descriptive words and not using the same ones twice in the same haiku. A lot of the time while I was beginning to write these I was using really meek words that you'd throw into any other sentence, but I thought that didn't sound good so I went through and changed them to more flowing and better sounding words. Through doing this I felt I had finally made them out to what I had intended for them to be in the first place.
After I had made the first change to my haiku's I had thought that I needed to add more to them. After thinking about what I could add for a little while I thought that I would add more topics of what they could describe. After thinking, I decided that I wanted to add Truth and Power Haiku's to the list. I had only just finished writing out the haiku's about Power when it occurred to me that it sounded kind of repetitive to War. After realizing this I thought that it didn't sound very good so I dropped the idea of adding more tho them and got rid of the Power section. After they had been removed the original series of haiku's went together much better than when I wanted to add more and had more haiku's about Power. Once I had removed the Power haiku's, the poems went together much more smoothly and there was not some random series sitting in the middle of the two originals. I think that without the extra haiku's in there it sounds a lot better and helps the message of the original two series be a lot more clear, as well as make them have a much better feeling to them. Overall, after I had made this change, I think that the Peace and War haiku's turned out to be just fine.
Finally, the last major change that I had made to my series of haiku's was deciding that I wanted to create an art piece to match up with my haiku's. After a while of messing around with painting and such, I decided to do a digital art piece that matched up with the theme of Peace and War. I had created several rough copies of the paintings before creating the final one, with all my ideas poured into one. After creating the final art piece for each theme I think that it really helped relay what my haiku's were about so much more than just reciting them to a crowd. To go along with the art pieces I had recorded myself reciting my haiku's in a somewhat dramatic manner. It had taken several tries to get it so that it sounded good, as well as having to move from building to building to find a quiet spot for recording. After my voice was recorded I had added peaceful music to go along with the theme of Peace, and I had also added more dramatic and fast paced music to go along with war. After adding these things to the way that I was going to present my haiku's, I think that it really helped create a certain mood for each theme and the pictures got the imagination flowing in a sense of helping the listener imagine what was going on the scene described through the haiku's.
After making these changes to my series of haiku's I think that they turned out a lot better than what I had originally intended for them. I really liked the way that they came out after refining them and I think that they sound a lot better than what I had before I made changes.